Sunday, March 25, 2007

what would bacon do?



i have been very sick and very neglectful of b.s.s.
drinks at tavolata, followed by jay's special concoctions have led to this blog, in which i extole the virtues of bacon.

-my personal bacon concoctions: the b.l.tini (bacon salt rim, lovage infused gin, tomato water), apple tarte tatin with blue cheese ice cream and candied bacon, bacon caramel-filled chocolates, and bacon brittle (recipe below).

-my suggestion of adding bacon bits to the chocolate gelato and peanut butter caramel dessert at oliver's twist

-bacon mints, bacon wallet, bacon band aids, and my personal favorite, "what would bacon do?" spin folder- courtesy of archie mcphee

-mathlete.com's wake n' bacon wooden pig-shaped alarm clock that wakes you up with the delicious smell of one strip of frozen bacon cooked under a halogen lamp.

-amazon lists 116,911 books with the keyword "bacon"; 745 of those are in the Gay/Lesbian subheading...really not surprising considering all the euphimisms (meat curtains, hiding the double-smoked, cured winter salami), as well as my two most recent purchases: Seduced by Bacon and Pork & Sons.

-Au Pied de Cochon Restaurant in Montreal

-Pork soup dumplings from New Bo Green in New York's chinatown

-in my fourth or fifth blog mention, i must also include the tonkotsu ramen at Samurai Ramen. liquid pig goodness, lip-sticky demi-glace-ness, pure deliciousness. somehow, minus the pork slice, plus tofu balances out the pigginess for me.

-bacon soda, rumor has it, local soda company Jones Soda came out with it as a follow-up to their popular turkey and gravy soda...

-"bacon is for lovers" bacon aphrodisiac dinners at david greggory restau*lounge in d.c.

-rauchbier, a family friend brought back this smokebeer from germany. seriously, bacon-flavored beer. "The intensely smokey flavor in this dark, rich beer comes from exposing the unsprouted malt to burning slats of local beechwood. " sure, whatever it takes to talk you into drinking bacon.

-baconwhores.com. yes, you can actually get a faux-hooters girl, excuse me, "highly trained expert" to come to your house and "prepare" bacon for you, "exactly the way you want it". ANY way i want it? that's the way i get it?

-my only hit for bacon porn pulled up this gem, "Bacon makes everything crazy. Tie two hot dogs together with bacon. Strangle Bay scallops with bacon. Devil an egg and then stab it with bacon. Stick seventy-seven strips of bacon up a Cornish hen's ass. Rape a baked potato with bacon. Fuck with your peanut butter sandwich. When it's expecting the grape jam, hit it with the bacon. Crush 6 pounds of the extra crispy stuff and make your soups and salad cry. Oh, and bacon gravy! Throw 97 biscuits into a hot tub full of bacon gravy. Clog arteries. Grow love handles. Eat bacon. Wake up and smell the bacon, Utah. If cleanliness is godliness, bacon is truth. And the truth shall make you clean. Nobody wants to smell like bacon, obviously, but in the spirit of watching The Black Table's kooky ideas gurgle, belch, and shit all over the floor, we bring you bacon soap."

Bacon Brittle
1 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup light corn syrup
1/2 cup water
1 Tbsp. unsalted butter
2 tsp. vanilla extract
1 tsp. baking soda
3/4 tsp. salt
3/4 cup chopped pecans
1 cup crispy cooked bacon, in bits (about 12 oz. uncooked bacon)

Grease or butter a large nonstick baking sheet, or line with a Silpat mat. In a heavy medium-sized saucepan, combine the sugar, corn syrup, and water over medium heat. Stir until the sugar dissolves and the syrup comes to a boil. Attach a candy thermometer to the pan, increase the heat to high, and cook without stirring until the mixture reaches 290 degrees. Immediately remove from the heat. Stir in the butter, vanilla, baking soda, salt, pecans, and bacon bits. The mixture will foam quite a bit. When the foam subsides, pour the hot mixture out onto the prepared baking sheet and, working quickly, spread thin using a silicone spatula or two forks. If the brittle starts to set up before you have spread it out thin, set the baking sheet in a hot oven until the candy softens and continue to spread. Cool at least 10 minutes before breaking into pieces. Store in a covered container.

p.s. jay made me a cocktail with black radish, tequila, sea salt and lime juice. mmmmm.

1 comment:

J&D said...

And we thought we were the only people in Seattle who loved bacon this much.

We are Justin & Dave the Seattle based manufacture of Bacon Salt. A fat free zero calorie, vegetarian, Kosher approved, gourmet, bacon flavored seasoning salt that really tastes just like bacon. Bacon salt goes on everything from steak and potatoes to chicken, eggs, fish, prawns, even salads and vegetables. My personal favorite is in Bloody Mary’s.

Visit our website at www.baconsalt.com for recipes and more or email us at passthebacon@baconsalt.com and we can discuss the greatness of bacon. Bacon Salt goes into stores in WA in 2 weeks and is available for purchase online at our website.